Friday, July 29, 2005

well...I wont smoke THAT much...

Fucking scrambling to find a dropped lighter while stoned is one of the scariest 5 seconds of your life.

Yes this is how I’m spending my Friday evening.
Why is being shirtless stoned such a mission impossible?
I can’t believe how paranoia-central it makes me. Who are these freaks of nature that walk shirtless on the beach or in groups of other people? So of course I’m chatting on the phone in front of an open window when two people walk DIRECTLY by and make eye-contact with my half-and-half naked self. I never did such an awkward duck in my life. Now I’m totally “that guy who spends Friday nights shirtless and stoned” of this geighborhood.
And seriously waiting the 7min + for water to boil 3 eggs is a triumph deserving of a metal. I had to eat three mini ice-cream sandwiches just to tide myself over. They’re mini so technically I’m still on the Zone.
UPDATE: contrary to the belief of a man who just e-mailed me I am not pleasuring myself in that picture. Nor was I completely naked. There were pants people. And I WASN’T touching it.


Blogger n.v. said...

Flesh! Are you back???

1:37 AM  
Blogger sixshooter said...

You get stoned shirtless? I didn't think you did ANYTHING shirtless? I thought you even bathed fully dressed. Hmmm, you learn something new every day.

And the pic does seem to imply that you are ... well ... you know. But whatever you say.

7:35 AM  
Blogger A. Estella Sassypants said...

I've never been stoned (call me goody-goody), but I think I'd do it shirtless if I was to get stoned.

5:26 PM  
Blogger yournamehere said...

Flesh, I'm glad you're back. It does look like you're pounding the pud in that illustration, by the way. Yep, looks like someone's makin' gravy.

Andi, I've vowed to make inappropriately lewd comments to you on your blog ONLY, so I'm letting the whole "stoned shirtless" thing go.

11:14 AM  
Blogger Data Panik said...

Shirtless? Sexy? I hope so.

9:16 PM  
Blogger Evil Petting Zoo said...

So what if the pic looks like you're playing pocket pool. Have at it I say. Welcome back.

9:29 PM  
Blogger sixshooter said...

and from the pic, I'd say you were quite the hairy little mofo ...

8:10 AM  
Blogger A. Estella Sassypants said...

You can verbally grope me anywhere. Bring it on.

10:20 AM  
Blogger yournamehere said...

Andi, I can be in Dallas next weekend with a pound of weed and a hanger for your shirt.

9:21 PM  
Blogger Rob Danger said...

Dearest Nonv,
the computer is still illing but I'm gunna try to post a wee bit more.
Dearest 6tysex,
I hate being shirtless but when it's as hot in my apartment as it is my options are limited.
Dearest AndI,
'tis not for everyone. Besides, more for me!
Dearest YNH,
I assure you my phone-chats are strictly on the up-and-up.
Dearest Data,
Shirtless: yes.
Sexy: to-be-determined.
Dearest EPZ,
but I wasssssn't! honest!

11:40 AM  
Blogger vivahate said...

The paint-style spray paint body hair makes that whole picture worth while.

4:17 PM  
Blogger Egan said...

I missed you buddy. Are you back and badder than ever?

4:23 PM  
Blogger swirlogirl said...

i think i saw this same scene in my neighborhood last night!

9:53 PM  
Blogger sixshooter said...

Why do you hate being shirtless?

8:12 AM  
Anonymous dryvrgrl said...

I just think the weirdest part about this whole scenario is how many of US are out here waiting to here about a semi-naked fleshman doing anything....perhaps all of US can use a bit of anything on a Saturday night....?

Since you've been gone and gaycanada is so boring, I've had to go out and make a whole wack of new internet friends. Oh and I met Jazereth in real life.

10:32 AM  
Blogger Gwen said...

It's okay if you touched it a little bit, Flesh.

It's natural.

5:07 PM  
Blogger n.v. said...

Ghey Flesh, I can't take this anymore. Where are you?

11:20 PM  
Blogger swirlogirl said...

are you still standing in this window naked?

12:23 PM  
Blogger bagel said...

Come back Flesh, we miss you!

6:52 PM  
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2:16 AM  
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11:45 PM  
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5:22 AM  

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